Speed Dating

Speed dating is a formalized matchmaking process or dating system (a variant of a meeting system where the purpose is to enjoy romantic or friendship dates rather than decide anything). Its origins are credited to Rabbi Yaacov Deyo of Aish HaTorah, as a way to ensure that more Jewish singles met each other in large cities where they were outnumbered by non-Jews. It has been made more popular by its use on dating game shows—e.g., The Fifth Wheel—and has recently become popular in the gay community. Supporters argue that speed dating simply saves time, as most people decide if they are romantically compatible very quickly, and first impressions are usually permanent.

In the original idea of speed dating, men and women are rotated to meet each other for only eight minutes each, are forced to the next round no matter how much they are enjoying the interaction (or dread the next one), then submit to the organizers a list of who they would like to see again. If there is a match, phone numbers are forwarded. They cannot be traded during the initial eight-minute meeting, to reduce pressure (especially on women) to accept or reject a suitor to their face.

Critics of speed dating say it's shallow and tends to reinforce first impressions, which are often shallow to begin with. A scientific view of speed dating is that eight minutes is more than sufficient to determine if the range of a mate's hormones, a key indicator of immunities, is complementary (different) from one's own. This is claimed by some researchers to be the key factor in the so-called "first impression", and since it is olfactory (smell-based), there is no need for two individuals considering child-raising to spend more time on first impressions, it being more important to "sniff out" other mates.

This view is often rejected by critics as reducing humans to dog-like status, sniffing each other and then running off to sniff others. Another criticism of speed dating is that it tends to put less extroverted subjects at a disadvantage. Nevertheless, speed dating continues to grow in popularity, perhaps due to the very objections that have been raised to it.

Speed dating is considered, due to its low overhead and flexibility, to be akin to an agile method or open space conference. However, what's at stake in dating tends to be very different than the matters decided in an engineering or political conference.

Speed Dating in Pop Culture

Speed dating was featured in the following movies:

Hitch (2005)
The 40-Year-Old Virgin (2005)
An episode of Gilmore Girls featured Rory's friend Paris attempting speed dating after the death of her professor boyfriend, but finding herself frustrated with the lacking dating pool and elusive conversation.

Matchmaking

Matchmaking is any expert-run process of introducing people for the purposes of dating and mating, usually in the context of marriage.

Much modern matchmaking tends to substitute information technology or game-like rules for the expert's finesse - thus they are discussed separately under dating system. This article will focus on the role of human matchmakers.

In some cultures, the role of the matchmaker was and is quite professionalized. The Ashkenazi Jewish shadchan, or the Hindu astrologer, were often thought to be essential advisors. In cultures where arranged marriages were the rule, the astrologer often claimed that the stars sanctified matches that both parents approved of, making it quite difficult for the possibly-hesitant children to easily object - and also making it easy for the astrologer to collect his fee. The tarot has also been employed by some matchmakers.

Social dance, especially in frontier North America the line dance and square dance, has also been employed in matchmaking, usually informally. However, when farming families were widely separated and kept all children on the farm working, marriage-age children could often only meet in church or in such mandated social events. Matchmakers, acting as formal chaperones or as self-employed 'busybodies' serving less clear social purposes, would attend such events and advise families of any burgeoning romances before they went too far.

The influence of such people in a culture that did not arrange marriages, and in which economic relationships (e.g. "being able to support a family", "good prospects") played a larger role in determining if a (male) suitor was acceptable, is difficult to determine. It may be fair to say only that they were able to speed up, or slow down, relationships that were already forming. In this sense they were probably not distinguishable from relatives, rivals, or others with an interest. Clergy probably played a key role in most Western cultures, as they continue to do in modern ones, especially where they are the most trusted mediators in the society. Matchmaking was certainly one of the peripheral functions of the village priest in Medieval Catholic society, As well as a Talmudic duty of rabbis in traditional Jewish communities.

Since the emergence of the mythology of romantic love in the Christian world in medieval times, the pursuit of happiness via such romantic love has often been viewed as something akin to a human right. Matchmakers trade on this belief, and the modern net dating service is just one of many examples of a dating system where technology is invoked as a magic charm with the capacity to bring happiness.

The acceptance of dating systems, however, has created something of a resurgence in the role of the traditional professional matchmaker. Those who find dating systems or services useful but prefer human intelligence and personal touches can choose from a wide range of such services now available.

In Singapore, the Singapore Social Development Unit (SDU), run by the city-state's government, offers a combination of professional counsel and dating system technology, like many commercial dating services. Thus the role of the matchmaker has become institutionalized, as a bureaucrat, and every citizen in Singapore has access to some subset of the matchmaking services that were once reserved for royalty or upper classes.

The concept of matchmaking is also used in the business world and known as B2B Matchmaking, Business Events or Brokerage Events. In contradiction to social networking solutions, real meetings between business people are in focus. Trade fair organisations e.g. find this concept a added value for their exhibitors because it gives them the opportunity of advanced planned meetings.

In 2004 Solent Peoples Theatre (UK) adapted the format to create an activity for political representatives to consult with their constituents. A large number of UK local authorities now regularly hold Political Speed Dating events.

A 2002 episode of the Australian comedy series Kath and Kim, where Kim, estranged from her husband of 2 months, goes with her obese ugly friend Sharon to a Speed Dating event. However, all the girls there are overshadowed by Sharon due to her phenomenal knowledge of Cricket.